Oh, The Places You’ll Go

Dear Frank,

I was watching a video today and my eyes welled up with tears. I had so many thoughts about what I was experiencing that I thought it would be a good idea to write to you. After all, you are my confidant and the one with whom I can share all my deepest feelings, right?

Rob Kenney, father of two young adults, decided one day to start a YouTube channel entitled “Dad, How Do I?” It’s an intentionally unfinished title and he completes the question as he publishes each video with helpful information just like your dad would give you. Rob’s own father abandoned their family when he was 14 years old and he says that in starting these videos it’s his hope to help others. In just three months of starting the channel he has gained 2.44 million subscribers.

Some of the videos teach about household tools such as the electric drill, and others teach you how to stop a running toilet or tie a tie. In some, Rob simply reads aloud the sort of book your own father might have read to you. I find it so heartwarming that Rob does this to be instructive and comforting for viewers of all ages.

Today’s video was just that. Rob read aloud “Oh, the Places You’ll Go” by Dr Seuss. I watched how lovingly this man read, stopping to turn the book to the camera to show us the illustration on each page with a smile. As he read, I looked at his balding head and his broad shoulders and I thought about his good heart, so genuine and kind. It’s apparent in every one of his videos. Here’s a link to that video:  https://youtu.be/1vli-al3wR0

Within moments, as I watched, a heavy yearning overcame me, a sad feeling from the child I once was. I wanted so badly to have experienced a dad who read to me. I don’t remember being held, carried on shoulders, read to, danced with, encouraged or cared about by my father. He had come back from the war with a wound that was so bad it required many months of hospitalization and therapy. Afterwards, he developed a problem with alcohol and anger, most likely from the pain he endured, and it continued for years, leading to my parents’ divorce. So, at the age of 10, I, along with the rest of my family, exited the small town we loved so much, Marlin, Texas, located off Highway 6, and headed to Austin, where mother planned a new life for us. My father remarried soon thereafter and started a new family. After a few short visitations that first year, we never saw him again.

Yes, I do remember that when we were family, he took us on vacations, that he loved to keep the beat to the music in the car, and that he was well-liked in our community. But, I personally remember nothing about his being a dad to me. There was no one-on-one contact except for a pretty bad spanking I’ll never forget. No conversation, no hugs, no …  love. But, forgiveness (as it always does) brightened the path towards newness:

Little did I know, my life was going to take a beautifully positive turn as God paved the way for a rich life, introducing me to love in so many countless other ways.

I cleaved to my brother, David. He was my protector and best friend. We’ve always finished each other’s sentences. To this day, I know he will defend me and is the one who will work tirelessly to help me with anything I want or need. I feel the same towards him.

My sister, Ann, is and has always been my rock. She loves me unconditionally, as I do her. We support each other in all the situations of life, enjoying each other’s victories, fixing problems, bolstering each other’s faith, laughing so hard together that we cry, and praying together, through difficulties great and small.

After a failed marriage almost 24 years ago, I look at how beautifully life has progressed and how love has flourished and grown, surrounding and hugging me like a flowering vine. The voids that I didn’t think could be filled are now full and overflowing.

While they were growing up, my children, who are my greatest loves, forged a great bond as we moved forward as a team. And today, they’re grown, married, and we still have that bond.

My son, David, is loving, encouraging, hilarious and fun to be with, and we consistently find projects that the two of us can do together. Our mutual respect for each other’s opinion and advice is a true gift. Plus, he answers my texts at the drop of a hat, no matter how inane they are!

And now, his darling Haddie and I are forging a new, loving relationship as she joins our family and he joins hers. It’s a joy to experience this new chapter with her. The flowering vine continues to flourish.

My daughter’s love and friendship is such a blessing. There isn’t a day that passes that we don’t have an idea for something that will bring happiness to the other. Bess’s sweet and generous nature as a daughter, wife, mother, friend, knows no bounds. Plus, she is an old soul and has always known my heart.

My son-in-law, Lee, gives me hugs and smiles at every turn, knowing just the right sort of insane joke or twist of words to make me laugh, and does whatever it takes to make certain that my life, without doubt, is injected with good things, consistently filling it with adventure and joy. I thank them both for giving me such lovely grandbabies.

There are many in my life, my family and friends, who have shown me what love is, and I say to them…

Lovely person, if you are reading this over Frank’s shoulder, you know who you are. I love you. And you, too, my new friend of recent years. And you, whom I haven’t seen in several years. You, the one who shares life with me through social media. That husband of a dear friend – you’ve been a valuable friend, too. And you, a classmate from way back when — we now share such fun memories.

The friend of my son or daughter, who includes me in your life, You! And the ones who provided such a great support through my divorce. You, the great friends whose lives entwined with mine while we raised our children together and now we celebrate the glorious experience of grandparenting. And you, the friend I met just last week!

We share our adventures together. Thank you.

Frank, you are a good toad and I’m glad I can write to you about these things — love and forgiveness.  Now, as I begin to celebrate my 69th birthday, I’m thankful for Rob Kenney, who brings tears to my eyes as he reaches out to touch the lives of the fatherless. I know he is filling the void with so many. He’s a fine illustration to us all of what we can be in the lives of others. Isn’t that just the greatest thing?

I’m glad his video spoke to me strongly and caused me to tell you of the folks I love and the folks who love me. It’s been a very good day.

Love,

Jane

PS. To watch more of Rob Kenney in action, just follow this link.

https://www.youtube.com/c/DadhowdoI

There, you can subscribe to his channel and receive a notification each time he posts a new video. That way, you can regularly see the incredibly kind and fatherly way this one man spreads peace, comfort and love to everyone who will receive it.